The Patty project

02/02/2022.

Today I got another tattoo; yes it’s a flower and a Gardenia to be exact.

For most of my childhood our family lived in the same house in Smithfield (2164) and at the front of the house just below the steps was a gardenia plant. My mum’s mum (my grandmother) was the one who planted the gardenia in that spot and for many years she sprouted beautiful white flowers that you could smell from near and far.

My mum is a natural with plants and she carefully tended to her mum’s Gardenias for many years even after she had returned to Uruguay and sadly passed away.

We’d often find clippings of the flowers placed in vases throughout the house and mum would make plants for others from the clippings too.

Needless to say, Mum had a special attachment to this plant and I think it’s safe to say that it had sentimental value to her that reminded her of her mum.

When it came to my sister and I we took it for granted and were just used to the plant being there, sprouting and smelling nicely throughout the year as it was meant to do.

One year my sister was not in a good place and her allergies were playing up so she hacked the plant and disposed of it.

Mum was devastated and heartbroken.

A few months ago mum gifted me a plant for our new house and it was a potted gardenia; shortly after it sprouted and by surprise I caught a whiff of the familiar smell from my childhood – it took me back.

I called mum and asked her what the english name for the plant was so I could look it up – she told me it was a Gardenia.

I knew right then that the next tattoo to join my symbolic lotus and sunflower was to be a Gardenia.

This evening, a few hours after I got the tattoo I met up with someone dear to me and she asked about it. I summarised my story about who planted it, who cared for it and who tried to eliminate it – and then me (and the small part I played in it’s existence and the family at that time).

It was interesting how she put what I had said in her own words and made reference to the ‘story’ being like the journey of the women in our family.

My grandmother deeply planted the roots, my mother watered, cared for and nurtured the plant (even after her mum left us), my sister (due to her mental illness and lack of self-awareness) chopped it down trying to get rid of it for good – and me, I picked up the pieces, chose to remember it for what it was and chose to move forward.

My family is made up of strong women who each have their own very interesting stories.

The symbolism behind a simple flower that was planted approximately 40 years ago manages to tell a story that represents strong women forging to move ahead.

My Grandmother passed away when I was very young.

My sister passed away in her 30’s.

My mum’s now in her mid 60’s.

And I’m 46 this year.

It’s been a very long time since that first gardenia was planted.

My tattoo is symbolic of the journey of 4 women from one family who had no idea about the importance of this flower and what role it could play one day in the future.

Planting a seed, growing that seed, witnessing it being taken away and then working towards creating a new chapter of resilience and perseverance is what my mum achieved.

I am grateful.

When I see this flower I choose to see the beauty, I think of resilience and moving forward.

My family line is made up of some pretty strong, determined and passionate women and this Gardenia will always be a reminder of this/them.